Privilege Card??
~the dreamer
(*sunny*)
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/29/2007 10:12:00 PM 0 comments
人活着是要有梦想,要有目标。这样,人生才会过的更精彩!
您的梦想是设么?您的人生目标又时设么呢?
从小,我都有许多梦想。
还记得在我10岁时,我的梦想是当个飞机师。
穿着制服,飞在空中,多有形啊!
很快,13岁了。上了中学。
我当时的目标就是把自己的学业做得更好。
到了16岁,我的人生第一个春天来咯!
那时候,爱情是我生命中里最重要的。
飞机师的梦想也渐渐的被遗忘。
不是应为爱情,而是自己没能力去实现自己的梦想。
除了学业和爱情,我从没想过我的将来。
直到我18岁时,我爸开始不停的提醒,“是时候想想你的将来了”。
我挣扎了很久。在我爸的协助之下,我选择了IT这系。
不过我还是没变。18岁的选择只是个选择。
我还是没为我的将来作出设么努力。
在我19岁那年,春天已结束了。
那年真的是不好受。难受到想把一切一切也都结束掉。
从那年开始,唯一让我呼吸的理由就是我父母。
我就快21岁的早4天,爸爸离开了我。
突然觉得眼前一切都没了。
脑海里不停的问自己。。。。。。
“我的将来怎么办?”
“我快要生日了,爸爸对我的承诺,怎么办?”
“我快要毕业了,爸爸没办法看到,怎么办?”
“我和妈妈将来如何继续过没有爸爸的生活?”
“我和妈妈的生活费要怎么处理?”
还有许多许多问题。
这一切比19岁的难受还要痛苦千万倍。
当爸爸离开了,我才发现,自己是如此的依赖他。
责怪自己从没真真的去了解爸爸。
也更恨自己从没告诉过爸爸我有多爱他。
这,是我生命中最大的遗憾,也是我没机会弥补的错误。
5年已过了。
我也在工作了。
虽然念的是IT,工作的可是不一样。与IT没什么关系。
在这5年里。。。
有起有落,有是有非,有真有假,喜怒哀乐,生离死别。
所有的酸甜苦辣,我都尝试过了。
认识了设么是面具。
认识了设么是道具。
认识了设么是人情。
认识了设么是亲情。
认识了设么是友情。
应为认识了太多,我已经不敢再有梦想了。
我常担心。担心自己没那么幸运。
所有的期望,希望,都常被我的悲观而战胜。
自从爸爸离开了,我的人生不再有设么梦想或目标。
我觉得我原本都已缺少的自信心和悲观都变得更糟。
我的将来还是一张白纸,一片空白。
常觉得自己没那么幸运的我还是让命运去注定我的一切。
26岁的我并不是很快乐。
不知道我下一年又会如何。
就只能希望一切都能够顺顺利利的。。。
~the dreamer
(*晴*)
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/27/2007 04:22:00 PM 0 comments
i was craving for food.. not tt i didn't had my dinner but juz some crave.. realized tt i still had left 2 buns, decided to eat it all up wif a cup of coffee..
the buns was to expire on 23 Oct, so i tried to gobbled all up.. not till the 2nd bun did i realized.. OMG! it's oredi start to spread mold! hahaha... but i had no idea if the 1st bun is covered wif mold too.. hohoho.. anyway, no harm done.. no diarrhea.. thankfully!
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/22/2007 10:30:00 PM 0 comments
went to Sunway Pyramid for dinner..
in conjunction with FEI 5 KL Grand Prix 2007, The One Academy students are painting horses.. very nice n pretty...
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/21/2007 10:58:00 PM 0 comments
look wat i found on my desk... a DEAD BODY!
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/20/2007 12:57:00 PM 0 comments
during the trip to langkawi.. mom insisted to buy these colourful cocktail.. well, whenever she goes langkawi, she will fully utilized the benefits of the duty free island.. never once back home empty handed without any alcoholic beverage..
sigh.. she does not buy it for drink.. she get it for either the bottles or the colours..
but i do quite like this one... the colours are so nice.. :P
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/19/2007 08:24:00 PM 0 comments
i went to langkawi during the first day of raya.. to visit my grandparents, uncles and aunties..
took the evening flight there.. cheapest of the day.. came back on the 4th day morning cheapest flight.. hahaha.. save cost...
it wasn't a fun trip coz it was rather boring for me.. i spent my 2nd day sleeping due to headache... aunt n cousin nid to went back shop to help grandpa.. so left me n mom alone on the 3rd day.. went walking around town to look for the cheapest Bailey's upon request by jerry.. oso walked around town, hi & lo for Sport's Cappuccino chocolate.. was so upset when i couldn't find it.. went visiting relatives after tt.. 4th day, woke up early morning.. packed & ready to go..
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/19/2007 07:47:00 PM 0 comments
went candy shopping for my favorite cousin... he always asks me to bring him special candies when i go back langkawi..
sigh... it's so hard to search for one during last minutes.. but i still managed to get few imported chewing gums for him..
oh... i got candy too!
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/13/2007 12:16:00 PM 0 comments
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/07/2007 10:00:00 PM 1 comments
i had a blardy frust morning from OB.. was busy the whole day.. by the time i get home, i'm a lil' tired..
i went bathing this evening at about 7pm.. came down to find my mom shouting to me "surprise!" holding the bouquet and he, sitting there too.. but i knew it's not from him.. coz our anniversary juz passed, my bday's over, he cant possibly send me flowers for his own bday, dun think he's even proposing...
he n mom kept asking who's "vincent teh"... of all surname, they mention 'teh'.. and it gave me a strong feeling, it's not from a guy... hahahaha.. correcto! it's from a good fren of mine from college.. i shall call her mama 'teh'.. hahaha..
Posted by The Dreamer at 10/01/2007 11:08:00 PM 0 comments